For some reason, as children grow older, they are taught to start to withhold their emotions. It's not okay to express them in public anymore. But why not? Why, as adults, do we feel ashamed to express joy, excitement, fear, anger, and act upon them publicly as long as no one is harmed?
My five-year-old grandson is taught that it's okay to be angry as long as he doesn't hit anyone or break anything. He can yell, scream, and vent his rage. Sometimes he's not so nice when he's angry. But children don't t understand the emotions they feel and it's our job to guide them.
The other day, he had a meltdown over playing a video game. He shut himself in the bathroom and told he hated me and hoped I'd die. Of course he didn't mean these things. I stayed calm and told him through the door that I still loved him no matter what and he had to understand that sometimes he couldn't get what he wanted just by being angry and yelling. He calmed down and came out to apologize and tell me he loved me.
This kind of teaching is what guides children to understand how to express their emotions in a healthy way so that when they become adults, they know how to express them. If others around us don't like to see our joy, excitement, happiness, or even healthily expressed anger, they can learn from us or look away. What a better world this could be if emotions were a healthy, acceptable part of adulthood.
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