I haven’t said anything on Facebook, or even much in detail on other social media, but I recently came out as non-binary. One thing I did openly do was change my name. However, I never explained why I changed it. Syn is the name I chose for myself. They/them are my pronouns. There are probably many people who’ve known me for years are pretty surprised, perhaps there some who are not. To be perfectly honest, where I grew up and even lived in the Midwest is not a part of the country where gender is something other than make or female. It us frightening and difficult to feel differently from those expectations, particularly when you don’t even know the word for it. I grew up in the 1980s. Gay was something we knew about, but it was joked about, not really acceptable. Being gender questioning felt even scarier. As an adult, it was worse, if that is possible. There is a box of expectation a woman lives in, and trying to fit into that box when you don’t feel like a woman is horrible. When everyone tells you’re so pretty, such a lucky woman to be so beautiful, when everyone is telling your husband how lucky he is, it’s painful. You’re perceived as that. Do people really care about the person you are? Do they look past what they see and believe to be real? Social media has forced a lot of that on us. We only see what’s on the screen, how we’re supposed to get to know or remember people. I’m an agender non-binary person. I don’t feel feminine, I don’t feel masculine. My name is Syn. I have a spouse who is accepting me, doing his best to understand what this all means, and who knows that I am the same person I have always been.
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